GIRL IN PROGRESS ; DEFINING JAK

By JAK - November 04, 2020

Image from Google


Hi lovelies,


It has been ages. Just before I started this post I overthought for about five minutes because I wanted to craft the perfect opening sentence. However, there is nothing like a perfect opening sentence. Perfect sometimes is just a feeling. The perfect is an illusion. I prefer to look at things through a progressive lens where today is good enough and tomorrow will be better. 

SO MUCH FOR MY FIVE MINUTES PONDER.

Hi babies!!!!!  It is so good to be back here. I imagined what will bring me back to this place or What will make me write again? It has been over long. Somehow, it feels like I just lost focus in the last two months or so and refused to define my priorities but I am just so glad to be back.

I have never been about huge statistics and excessive numbers. If that comes fine, if it doesn't fine, too. It seems, however, that I suffer from a case of amnesia. A situation where I lose the memory of my goals.

Writing to me has always been a healing tool. It was one of the few ways as a child, that I felt useful and it was also one of the only things I could do to help me swim back to shore whenever I drowned in my own misery. 

Almost every material I have consumed lately about content creation talks about the customer is king, nobody cares about anybody else besides themself and yada yada. True talk maybe. 

BUT,

The thing here is this blog is not a business to me. It is not just a brand. It is a record of my learnings, my struggles, my wins, my mistakes, my life, YOU, ME, ALL OF US. It is more than just a regular start-up brand, this blog helps me stay connected with the world. It helps me muster the courage to go on and it's therapeutic to me too. I do not handle a lot of things well and writing is often one of the few routes I take that helps me handle a few things at least to some extent.

Just before my last post, I spoke to a friend who said He felt I did not really share about myself on the blog. I thought about it and realized I had veered off course to a large extent. The original intent was to share my imperfect life with you. Showing you how I go about it daily, defining each small segment one path at a time. 

For a second there, I forgot what and why I even started writing this post but the intent and motive is always the greatest test of sincerity. I wanted to share JAK, real and unfiltered with you and that is what I will do going forward.

Today was so awesome, I spent some time with the love of my life. It is so easy to say this with my full chest today but this wasn't always the case. I have learned, unlearned, and relearned with this person. I have gone through many lows and a few highs too. Most graciously this person has stood by me through thick and thin. So I just want to shout out to this person and say I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, MY LOVER.

One great lesson I have learned through everything is Self Acceptance is so important. It is so difficult to accept certain things about yourself, the negatives most especially. It is so much to brush some of these things off and act like they aren't there or wish that your faith will somehow make these things dissolve from your life. But as a budding Christian, it comes to my notice very frequently that God gave us free will in abundance.  This makes us liable to many potentials and decisions. If I do not read for an exam or prepare at all. My being a Christian won't make me pass my exams. I will have to set time aside and study. Divine revelation can help me read through the most important parts but at the time I am reading I may not be 100% sure that will come out in the exam but it can help me navigate a lot easier. 

In the same way, being a person of faith does not just suddenly make you a different human. It makes you see your inadequacies even better in my experience. You have to sort through some of these issues because wishful thinking and prayer alone might not deliver you.

Some weeks ago, I told a friend to list ten things she liked about herself, and surprisingly she spent some time having to think about these things. I am almost sure if I asked her to list twenty things she didn't like it would have been a much easier list.

While recently journaling, I decided to write ten things I liked about myself and I found out I was facing similar struggles. It was quite hard writing out things I liked about myself but in reverse, I am sure writing about things I didn't like would have been super easy. 

I think in the same way, a number of us might have these same struggles. I would just like you to appreciate yourself today. Take out a piece of paper or your journal or notepad and write out ten things you like about yourself. They do not need to be deep or serious. Just ten things that make you the awesome person you are. 

I am going to be a lot more present here. The goal is to help at least one person per post. Today, that person is me. I do not have it all figured out but I am a girl in progress. Everything will be good as the days go on. 

I just came to say hi. I hope we have been safe with all the things going on in our world right now. The many commotions in Nigeria especially. Please do stay safe. God Bless You.

All my Love,

JAK.

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