Hi Guys,

So I hope you all had an amazing day and your week started on a good note. Truth is I start every week feeling very hyped and saying stuff like "This is another opportunity to get it right again". Well SURPRISE! I start the next week telling myself the same thing only this time I add 

"it's okay that last week wasn't as productive as you would have liked it be". 

I watched an old interview with Men Fashion Blogger, Dr. Akin Faminu and I learnt a thing or two from that interview .Trust me, It isn't something you haven't heard before but I don't know if you have heard it this way. 

Now, right before I wrote this blog post I went to the dictionary to check out what the meaning of SELFISH is and it blew my mind. I grew up hating selfishness and all its followers cos I am a Christian and being selfish is supposed to be a bad thing. Well, here is the definition:

Like all good and bad things, there is always a flip side. So I will take you through the flip side of this definition. How about we define it as "Concerned primarliy with one's own interests, benefits, welfare, etc." then say regardless of others and devoted to caring only for oneself are the bad guys.

If I am being primarily concerned with me that means I put myself in focus. In my short journey with photography the truth is because something is in focus does not mean that the other things in the picture will not be visible. It just means that in that picture those other things are secondary. You will still see them but not as clearly as you see the object in focus. 

Example see this Beautiful blogger, Jessica Wang from www.notjessfashion.com here:

She is the focus but you can still see the cars and buildings. The fact that she is the focus doesn't make the other things invisible. It just makes her stand out more and ultimately makes the picture detailed and more beautiful.

In this crowded world, we really try hard to make everything else the focus while we stand in the background like the babe in the picture who photo-bombed this picture of course unknowingly.

Back to my video with Dr. Faminu, he said he always wanted to be a doctor but his passion was art. This may seem contradicting but from what I know he is doing a perfect job combining career and passion right now because he is a medical doctor who is changing the men style narrative through his eccentric style and his biggest inspiration to his style is his love for the art. If you ask me, I will say his ability to balance both must come at a price and I will call that price selfishness but thankfully no one is asking me. 

He attributes that balance to time management and to manage time you have to be selfish with your time right? You have to be intentional. You have to put yourself as the focus. He says in school he would use his free time to write blog posts and work on his fashion jobs. The best part is when you learn to put your self as the focus the others will eventually benefit because somehow you being at the center of things helps you reach the others from a balanced point. See this beautiful circle below.

You can sort of control how much of yourself you give to everyone and everything. To manage time trust me you will have to cancel a couple of gist sessions with your girlfriends or games with the boys or cancel a few other things that do not take primary focus.(NOTE: Do not abandon your guys or babes cos I said to cancel a few). But you know better which ones will need to go and which stays.

Back to the first paragraph of this post, for me to start saying "this week is another opportunity to do better" without adding even though last week wasn't as productive. I have to get a little selfish with some choices and get to put me at the focal point of certain things. I am still a Christian but now I see the word as SELF-ISH. 

You know how when you look at the meaning of the suffix "-ish", you see this

It means something has a tendency to be a certain way or has characteristics of something. 

My message is clear LET US MAKE US THE FOCUS. If we need to be a little SELF-ISH to achieve this then so be it. I am in no way saying we should not care about others at all or become wicked because we are making ourselves the focus but in this large world it is very easy to get lost in others and other things. Make YOU a priority today. Take a large chunk of your time to just focus on you. Trust me we may seem perfect on the outside but everyone benefits from a little ME time.

Thanks for coming to my TED TALK. 

P.S I say Trust Me a loooooooooooot. But actually trust you and trust me small too.  

I would love to hear your thoughts on this post down in the comment section. Let us learn from each other. Do not forget to pin all images and share this post to all your social media platforms so it can help someone else.

Follow me on Instagram here  and also send a DM so we can connect and learn from one another. 

All my love, 

JAK.