I came into myself for lack of a better term to express what happened and with growth always comes lessons. If there is one person who takes lessons seriously, it is I.

Today was a bitter sweet day. I had a roller coaster of emotions, seems to be the order these days. God forbid. I was really happy at one point, really sad at another, scared at one and hopeful at the end.

One take away for me from the day however was the conversation I had with my roommate, Thelma. She had come to a realization I termed "Come and Go".

A phenomenon where we didn’t come to life with anything and we would go out of life in the same way - without anything. She spoke about a lot of things actually but her emphasis was mostly on the fact that we need to have a cherish and let go attitude to life.

 I will share a small true story that I hope buttresses my point. 

The first time I liked a boy, it was massive. I couldn’t believe that JAK, a whole me could like someone. It was an unreal feeling. For the first few weeks, we texted a lot and longed to be with each other terribly. We were running a long distance crush relationship so that made me even fonder. I just wanted to spend physical time with him.

Sometime weeks later, we finally got our chance. He came to see me and it was at this point that things began to go South. He began to run late to our appointments and started making comments that did not resonate with me. I began to have doubts and began to feel like “Can I truly deal with all this in the long run?”

Long story short, we began to drift apart and I felt like crap. I wanted what we had at the beginning and I was crazy worried about the future. What would I do if I never find someone as special? What if he is the one? Can I let him go? And any other questions you all mushy folk ponder.

I was not ready to let it go. At some point I made up my mind I was better without him but the moment I think about not having that attention and affection I would retire to incessant crying and lack of appetitie. I would say it was a tough period.

In the end, we went our separate ways and I am better for it. Now I am a Nigerian robot who gives you relationship tips and I am waiting for the one.

Instead of worrying so much and asking uncountable questions, I should have cherished the amazing times we had together more and after the jolly good days when it was time for him to leave, let him go after crying and going through that motion.

My point however is that cherishing something and having to let it go can never be easy but realizing that in life, you don’t come here with anything, hence every positive and pleasurable experience should be enjoyed to the fullest, especially because tomorrow it can be gone.

On the flip side, every bad experience you face will not kill you. In the end it will go away. It will leave a big visible scar that you might remember over the good times but at the same time, Life na Come and Go.

Enjoy every experience to the fullest. Draw lessons. Let go a little gentler. It won’t be easy I am sure but as you get older you will see that this in fact is true.

I am surely smiling into 23 and happy birthday to my Sweetheart of a friend Somto. I love you Pal.

All my Love,

JAK